"Love Is Like Stepping On Broken Glass"

What is love? Love is the soft touches, the gentle caresses, it is the Hallmark card quotes, it is baby's breath, it is the whisp of a ray of sun as it crosses the cheek of the one you love...fleeting. But love is also something that we do not sometimes want to acknowledge, isn't it. Like stepping on a piece of broken glass. Yes, it hurts, but its a momentary hurt, and besides, the pain will pass quickly...as long as we work it out of our system...if we want to...
I have been incredibly lucky to have had a wonderful marriage, but for various reasons we are on seperate journeys. Its all good. She is moving on, I am moving on. I didn't leave for anyone...but myself...I rather enjoy my life as a single man. I see whomever I please, whenever I please. There are no constraints, no rules, no constrictions, no jealousies to deal with. I really enjoy my life, as it is...it is absolutely perfect, as far as I am concerned. I have a matrix of very close friends, some more than just friends, some more than just physical. But the closest is that of someone who is a true friend...someone I admire and trust and relish the friendship that has developed. How's that song by Carly Simon go? ..."That's The Way I Heard It Should Be"...

But what happens in this absolutely perfect little scenario?? That old bugaboo...love, caring, affection, concern...they all show up, like clowns in an old VW Beetle, arms and legs sticking out, making a mess of things. Not really a 'mess', care and concern and affection can be dealt with. It's that one in the funny shoes and the honking nose...yeah that one...love...Thats the one that can mess up things big time...can't it???

Now there are those out there that get this wispy...breathy ..."Oh My" when you mention love. You know...true love, an epic romance, classic Shakespeare kinda stuff. Christopher Marlowe said it so well..."Come with me and be my love, and we will all life's pleasure's prove,"...pretty heady stuff. But you see, its the heady stuff, its the little pieces of broken glass that we step on in the journey we face. Love woos you like a lamb...headed for the slaughter. It steals your heart with promises that seem too good to be true...and then...wham...you know it was too good to be true.
But I was different...Yessiree..I just got out of a 31 year relationship, I was happy, didn't want to ever get married again...life is good, I'm having fun...have some really neat, nice, caring, compassionate friends...and then...luv steps in... Another quote from that famous raconteur of love...John Donne said it best..."I am two fools, I know. For loving and saying so."

Well, I am a fool, but usually a tight lipped fool. I can keep things to myself pretty well. You don't get to be at my place in life without having a filter betwixt heart and mouth...But something has transpired as of late...and I suspect that I may have said something...but not entirely without the impetus to make a statement. It was time. Not the time I wanted to say it...but what do you do when you are forced to make a decision? Well, time spent at sea, on the battlefield...you make those quick decisions...and you just go with it...and hope that the fallout isn't the kind that sticks to you like napalm and burns your skin off.

I acknowledged something..and I am glad I did, because I am not the kind of person who can lie. You want to know the answer to a question? Ask away...I will always tell you the truth. Now you might not like the truth that you receive, and I will always try to be socially tactful...but if you ask...I will answer...so it was said...it was acknowledged...and I am afraid that the recipient was taken a bit aback by the answer. Like my friend...the partially transgenered ex-green beret...after a drink or two, she says..."we could be good together...you and me"...and she really means it. And to some folks...it would be the best of both worlds...but what do I say?..."No, not really...we would never work out"...and then you go on to list why it would not be good. She is always greatful that I am upfront, and tell her what is in my heart, because usually after the sun comes up...and marches its way past the noon hour...she is not an early riser...as I am...she says..."you always tell it like it is...don't you"...thanks..". It saves a lot of hurt feelings and mixed up emotions. But I hope that my last answer to a possibly uninteneded request for an answer won't change the relationship that I have with this person. It was always there. The fact that it was there, and there is no illusions...means that it's going to be there for a very long time. There are so many reasons why things would never work out...and that is fine...but you cannot squelch the human heart. as you might try...you fall for those whom the heart reaches out to. It doesn't need a tacit reciprocation. It keeps on pumping on its own accord...and you live with those little pockets of love...unrequited or not...hidden in the recesses of the heart.

We, as a race, as humans...are driven by love, we are driven to love...and sometimes we are even driven from love. Without love there wouldn't be a whole helluva lot to sing about, and even music seems to be torn when it comes to love. Some sing of love as the reason to live, like in 'Everlong' by the Foo Fighters and James Blunt's "You're Beautiful"..and then there's the opposite end of the spectrum..Tina Turners "What's Love Got To Do With It?".

There can be no more dangerous place to be, than in love. I prefer the realm of friendship...it makes life a lot easier.

To those who know of what I am speaking?...I was your friend...I'll always be your friend...but you have to know that there is love in my heart for you...and not just you...but all of my friends...thats the way I am...and "That's The Way I Heard It Should Be."
Namaste'

week 17 tagging

I used to envy the cataloguers...tucked away, indexs at hand, always tagging things for me, but somehow thier tags didn't help me find the things I liked to look for. But with the advent of the net and some nice tools, I can tag to my hearts content and be able to find exactly what it is I am looking for ...because I can decide...for myself what is worthy of tagging and in my own words. Gotta love technology!!

week 30 the end of the line!!

it is ended...30 weeks of self discovery and new technology. wikis, myspaces, blogging, vlogs, im'imng, the anacronyms go on forever. Truth be told, I had discovered a great many of these on my own, but it was nice to see them all presented in an orderly format, and if one is truthful, one can always learn new techniques on using them.

So, thanks for all the info, and the links and something old and something new....and now...keep it coming...this is a great way to learn./..hadns on! is the way to go!!

week 29 blogging and 2.0

almost to the end, it is in sight and I have learned a great deal from this course, and the really exciting thing is that I know that there is so much more out there to learn!

But given the tools and the learning, I think that I will be able to proceed on a self-motivated trip down the electronic highway!!

Thanks 2.0!!

week 25 podcasting summery

An interesting phenomenon...podcasting. For little or no money, anyone can put out over the internet thier own views, thier own likes and dislikes! And there are some very good podcasts out there, and then there are some real bag-o-worm's.

But overall I think that podcasting is an interesting and informative way to get out your message to more than your closest friends.

week 27 Library Thing

We've discussed this already, but a revisit after the fact is a good thing. I love LT because it continues to flow and evolve. Now you can sign up for free prepub copies of new books , and all they ask is that you right a revie. What more could you want out of life?

And they continue to imprtove search capabilites to make it easier to seek and find. I only have about 3500 copies catologued, not too bad, but I used to have 12,000....so there is lioght at the end of the tunnell!!

week 24 podcasting tools

There are a host of free tools out there for the beginning podcaster. It doesn't take much to get started and a good number of these apps are free. One of my favorites is called Audacity, a wonderful application that will record through your microphone, and you can tweak it to sound better, to highlight a particular point, and it is done in color so everyone can visually see what is being done. Also the ability to save the file as something that can be rebroadcast, or sent and saved...who needs public access on cable anymore???

week 23 Youtube

When I was moving from one place to the other and my cable was not yet installed, I began to wonder....what else is out there, besides my collection of dvd and vhs tapes?...Well, there's always Youtube, and wonderful collection of films, skits, movies and some downright garbage...lol...but that is the price you pay for free access to the net and the web!

There is a much gigher percentage of real drek out there, it seems thay anyone with a camer thinks him or herself as the next steven spielberg!

But historucal documentries from the 40/50/60'S, comedy routines, favorite actors and actresses, there is plenty of stuff out there for you to view, all for the clicking of a mouse.

And if you feel brave enough...upload one of your favorites...

Week 16 Myspace

What a grand and wonderful tool is Myspace! I have met some very interesting and somewhat unusual folks through my myspace page. Through the process of blogging, and journaling, and messaging back and forth I have managed to make and keep some pretty interedting online friends. Like the philsophical black jack dealer from reno? Or the mother of 13 kids in the woods of upstate ny, and the list goes ever on. I get to listen to new and up and coming artists...so if you haven't dabbled with myspace...do yourself a favor and discover the winders to be found within!!

Week 13 Wikis

Wikis have been an interesting phenomenon, but one should apprache th einformation couched within with due caution. Nowadays, ANYONE can publish something on the line, whether or not you have an editor or a publisher, whether or not you have checked your facts. So 'buyer beware'...when it comes from a place like Wiki-pedia.

Week 15 Social Networking

Although a somewhat new phenom, social networking is an interesting concept, if done with care and concern of the others .. "Back in the old days"...you went to the feed store, the post office, the mill, any number of people friendly places, but now in our midst we have at hand a wonderful resopurce, that breaks down walls and barriers.

I know that my circle of friends has expanded considerably, which in turn leads to more wonderous places to see and thingas to do!~!

Week 6 Blogging

Blogging??...a new word in the last few years...web-blog...but what a curious way to put things down on paper...err.....screen. I was an inveterate journaler for many years, and still do prefer pen to paer, but my thoughts come more rapid fire if I can put my thoughts down on screen.

Blogging is all around me now, even my kids blog...and more so I blog with them daily. Another way of the evolving methods of conversation...notice...not a replacement for but an evolving of....human speak is still the best, but we tend to open moreso when doing so anonymously.

Long live the blog!!!

week2 Lifelong Learning

I often wonder about those of us in the information field who hjave no desire to further thier knowledge of the world in and around them? It's like working in the library, and saying..."Oh...I don't care to read!"...what a sad statement to make.

Stasis is anathema to me, I crave change, the challenge to rtey new things, stir the pot a bit. Thats how you make a good soup...you stir and yourt stir, you tweak the flavor here and there until your finished product is a veritable feast for the mind.

I look forward to the day that I can retire and go back to school!

Week 1 Discovery

What a change time has made for me. I was never able to pursue an academic career due to constraints on family, time and profession, so I have always pursued self advancement of knowledge on an 'on my own' basis...and every day, every month, every year things get more and more exciting. The advancements in research, in library availiability around the world, access 24/7 to museums, libraries and tools have made amazing strides.

I guess thats why I love what the net has evolved into. Gone are the days of "the well" at Berkely,no graphics, just connections to other individuals. You gott love this new technology!!

thing 28 Rollyo

Rollyo Polly o...just not something I ever got into. I tend to make my own lists of websites, to be sure, and this l;ittle applet seems to make it easier, but I have found that in the long run, not one of my favoriter places or sites to use.

I think that there is too much leewqay in its use, not enough structure..at least for me. Just my opinion. Perhaps I need to play around with it a bit more...

thing 26 Image Generators

I knew that I was never going to be a famous explorer or a welathy businessman, but with a flick of the wrist, a slip of the mouse button I find myself on the cover of the national geographic, or sitting in a suit as one of the wealthier men in americas! What a boost to the ego!...lol...but I have seen these filed professionally printed and sent to a printer to have it mounted. Not a bad prank, a fun joke to share...and an ego boost for the one on the cover!!

thing 22 flickr mashups and trading cards

At first this seemed like a fun and interesting little item to play with. But here it is a few weeks later and we are trtying to come up with ideas on how to enage the children into our activities...and lo and behold...a thought? ! How about making a series of trading cards, based on the various characters in the new program!

Easirer said than done, and with the knowledge gained in past work units, we now have a solid lead on the summer reading program, some innovative idea, customized to fit our needs.

Look for the trading cards coming to a library near you...as long as you are close by...and participating!!

week 21 tagging essentials

As one who works with information, I completely understand how tagging and decriptors help others find essential information. It is one of the primary reasons why I like the new technology that allows us as individuals to format, to shape, to make our lives easier with tagging...anything and everything in our lives. But one is to remember, that if you wish to share the said information...they perhaps there some try to be some adhereace top industry standards.

week 20 flickr

ahhh...my friend flickr...ummm...wait...I don't think flickr is my friend...it's user friendly...its useful...but I see no reason to implement all the details of my life with pictures so the entire world will have all kinds of information ...visual... at least...available to them.

Nice application, but not really useful to me...think I'll pass.

week 19 free tools , technoroti

There sure are a lot of free things out there, aren't there, but are they all worth it. Some have may had awards added to thier title, but are they worth it at a 'free' price'?. Sometimes...you have to remember...you get what you pay for!

Some of the tools that had awards tagged to them seemed useful, and others seemed completely worthless for me in my work...but thats quite alright....it would be impossible to keep up with every new innovation...just as it would be physically impossible to stop and look at every piece on display in the smithsonion...an impossible task.

thing 14 adding to the wiki

wiki wiki...who's got the wiki? and who has the authority to change it? In one sense I like the ability change something, a collaborative effort, and yet somehow it seems all too easy to shift things, perhaps to shed a more gfavorable light onto a subject? Possible ramifications for abuse might be too eays to pass up, but then again...it can always be noticed and corrected then, can't it?

week 11 Images

Images...those elusive bits of film and chemical that fade with time, that get lost in the sotrms and the fires, that we never get around to mounting, to sending out to friends and relatives. Nut now, with electronic format, not only do you have instant satisfaction, you have instant dissemination to anyone that you care to.

But what if it was a lousy picture? Well, with the new photo editing software out there, its simple to take out the red eye, change the intesity of the sun, take out the shadow...with the right kind of software you can recolor that hideous seersucker jacket uncle earl was wearing...or after aunt bertha has been released from rehab and ran off with the chihuaha trainer...you can take her out of the picture completely!

You gotta love this new technology!!

week 10 youtube

I was never much of one to watch tv...but when I did watch, the funniest video shows always made me laugh. I've never owned a video camera, and when I would miss an episode, well, that was it. Unless I reprecorded the show. But with such tools as youytube and yahoo video and myspave video...there is absolutely nothing you can't watch, find or replay at your leisure! Pranks, instructions on how to cook chicken marsala, how to carve a heron, watch documentary's long lost to film archives...it truly is an amazing tool.

week 9 Photos and images

I can only think back and laugh about how easy it is today to manipulate images with the computer. Back in the day, one of my jobs was to provide ummm...alternative forms of ID to individuals...within the armed forces...and it was a laborious process. And you might fool the border guars, or the security forces. Now...today, with a flick of a button, a transfer of a file, you can have a drivers liscense from any state in the country...( I know,...you're not supposed to do that...but it out there!). But aside for the wrogful way to handle things...the right way is so much fun. Why should the beatles be the only one to have a psychadelic poster made of themselves? Why should donald trump be the only guy on Fortune Magazine?

I love the computer and if you're lucky enough to have photoshop...the world is in the palm of your hand!

week 8 tagging

tagging...now everyone can be thier own cataloguer! I'm, not certain that the professionals are thrilled about that, burt it sure does simplify life for a lot of folks. Perhaps my descriptiors are not the same as my neighbors, but isn't the idea of technology to make life easier for the individual?....

Just a thought....

I find myself adding my own tags to my music fils for my mp3 player, my own tags for my books, tags for information....I do this to simplify MY life. Standards are fine...for an industry wide application...but when it comes to personal information...let the free market reign!!

week 7 myspace

I do remember the wind up telephone in our old farm house...one long...2 short...that was our signal...but then everyone else could listen in also...if they were of a mind to. Then there was the telephone...beautiful, heavy black bakelite...nothing lite about it, that sucker was heavy! Now, whenever I wish to 'talk' to one of my kids...I just log on to my myspace account...or my facebook account...and leave a message.. or facebook...and if they are online, then they will respond back pretty quickly. The funny thing is...even though I have a cell phone, the message that I leave on a cell, seems to take a considerable amount of time to be transmitted, and sent. I sometimes get much faster service with myspace or facebook. A great way to stay in touch with friends...and to make new friends!

Week 5 - Instant Messaging

WIKI's??? I used to think a wiki was some kind of totem you picked up in java or the atolls in the south pacific...but wikis are a great way to disseminate information...hopefully in a good fashion. Sure, there is bound to be some abuse of the format, but as in all good research, check your sources!! A lot of good can be had with something like a wiki...there are no more sharper eyes out there than a dedicated fan when it comes to verifying information! Just post something about how the 125 windows on the death star were glazed over with a certain color film...and I can guarantee you...someone will write in and dispute your answer, because he was one of the workers. A grand thing it is!!

Week 5 - Instant Messaging

IM...who would have ever thought that the library would have IM? Back when we got our first computers, all the buzz was how to keep certain individuals (public) from spending all day on the computer messenging back and forth...tieing up the computers ...but here we are, a few years down the road and we're answering questions via IM...Life sure is funny isn't it??

RSS & Newsreaders week #4

Back in the day...when newsmen read the news, timed, and you had to listen for something that was of interest to you, it was such a long time ago!...lol...but now with RSS feeds, the news is channelled to you...just like you were one of those important business magnates...with a ticker tape...built in to your very own computer. Now you can keep up with the exact details on any subject line...it's a pretty amazing thing when you think of it!

There are those who could care less about this level of technology, but with the way that this is going,....the uninformed will be left to the side of the electronic road. Life will not stop for them, to be sure, but they wiill not be anywhere near the crowd when interesting developments occur. But then again, perhaps they didn't ever want to be there in the first place? Not everyone is curious enough to pursue some things. Not a bad thing in itself...

Here be bloggers #3

The only difficult thing was trying to keep up with the time to put something down....blogging is second nature to me, as I tended to journal...by the old fashioned pen and ink method, and still do...but in terms of ease, nothing beats blogging!!

The End of the Line? #30.....

Were there any take-aways or unexpected outcomes from this program that surprised you?
What could we do differently to improve upon this program’s format or concept?And last but not least…
If we offered another discovery program like this in the future, would you again chose to participate?

This has been overall an interesting and informative way to be introduced into the new ways and means of communication within the library...an enjoyable exerise. I would love to keep learning this way...self directed learning is a great way to keep up with things of this nature. I constantly do it with many small applets on my webpage. Whenever an new article comes in on the RSS feed, it's almost like chirstmas everytime I head over to thier wbsite and see what new applet, what new gizmo has come out. Not everything is useful or can be used within our framework...but just having knowledge of forthcoming trends is a satisfying thing...at lreast to me.

podcasting!. your very own talk show!

The idea of podcasting seemed at first to be a rather limiting function for us in the library related fields, but I have found the exact opposite to be true! I have been able to assist a number of patrons with free podcasting software that can be found on the net, and then even participated in a number of monthly podcasts with a group of study groups. It's like having a serialized book on tape, made just for the group of friends in the exact subject you're interested in.

I think this is going to be a very useful tool in the future...as long as we remember...podcasting doesn't make you an expert...or assure that the content is correct. So do your homework and check your facts before you rely on a blog or a podcast for credit on a grade!

Looking back...by looking forward...

This has been an interesting experience for me, I was familiar with a good number of the tools mention in the training, but it was nice to be able to share...as a group...our experiences and little hidden steps to making things work a little easier.

I am also finding that these exercises have been helpful to me in working with our patrosnn.mI no longer have to look at someone with a somewhat blank face when they ask if I'd wiki's this, or blogged that! While not on the cutting edge of the wave of technology, I feel that we are on the curl of an awesome ride to come.

Back To The Future!!

All of this "new" technology is so much fun, but boy is it time consuming!...But I have found an interesting difference in learning styles. I have seen, worked on and participated with many of the items that have been set forth in this learning 2.0 process...and while I can appreciate the orderliness of it all, the things that I have already been working with for well over a year or two in the past, such as Library Thing, blog spot, wiki, podcasting, etc...I find it rather difficult to go over the exercises and "re-talk" about these items? I stumbled across many of these items due to the forums that I lurk about on and when something "new" is discovered...I try it out, and see if it is something that can fit into my time frame of a useful application, and wonder "how will this make my life and work easier?".

SO, for all you folks out there discussing how "none of this will help me" to "I don't have the time"...consider that I have been stumbling across many of these items in my own way for a number of years, and it would have been nice to have had it all set down before me in a nice, neatly ordered structured environment. True, we are not going to need all of these items in our everyday lives, but as information professionals, I think that our job is not just 'readers-advisory'...it is also as a 'web-advisor'...Because our patrons have little or no experience in dealing with these applications and might not know that they are even out there, in much the same way that we introduce them to a new author or a new series, it is our responsibility to introduce our patrons to new applications that will make their experience at the library and even better one...